Sconnie Molly

Halloween twenty eighteen

All I am doing to celebrate Halloween today is eating a few more Dove dark chocolates than usual. A normal day I have 3 or 4. Today it’s been maybe 7? I know. The wildness.

I guess I liked Halloween enough as a kid; I dressed up in different years as Raggedy Ann, a princess, a “fifties girl” wearing a poodle skirt and my dad’s high school letter jacket – that one I recycled at least twice, I loved it so much. In college I did the slutty thing, one year as a French maid and one year as a “sexy gangster” – although looking back at the photos, honestly, neither costume was terribly risqué and I have no regrets.

But since then I’ve only dressed up and/or gone to a party a couple of times. And now that we’re firmly in our 30s, it’s obviously more about people’s kids now. Halloween is one of the few days a year that parenting looks genuinely fun. Of course I know a lot of work goes into some of those elaborate costumes, but really, you can put a cute kid in anything and people will gush. So, I don’t know, I guess Halloween is a little sad for me lately. I haven’t said much in recent months about our infertility issues because well, duh, we’ve kind of had some other shit to deal with. But now that we’re somewhat “settled in” here, we’re going to check out some of the Seattle-area fertility clinics and talk about maybe doing (yet another – like the 4th or maybe 5th) IUI or perhaps starting in vitro. IVF is so scary. I don’t want to do it. But maybe that’s what it’s going to take.

We are developing our new routines. Once a week we take the bus to eat breakfast at the Belltown Biscuit Bitch and have ourselves each an egg cheese & vegetarian sausage Bitchwich. V usually can’t finish his so I kindly help him out. Every Saturday we try to go for a walk around Green Lake, which is a beautifully peaceful 2.8 miles populated with a truly insane number of adorable doggos. (Seriously, Seattle has a TON of dogs, but at Green Lake it is on another level.) I’ve been exploring different neighborhoods on foot and via public transit, including the very nice (and simple) light rail. I go to coffee shops a lot and order Diet Cokes (though today I tried a delicious blood orange and hibiscus tea) and attempt to write.

Speaking of coffee, after agreeing we were both feeling pretty lonely, on Monday V and I joined a Meetup group that does trivia all over the city. It was us and three other dudes, very friendly and cool guys. One of the trivia rounds was “coffee” and wouldn’t you know, we’d somehow managed to assemble the only five people in the city of Seattle who do not drink coffee. We bombed that round, but actually ended up winning the night and leaving Mama’s Kitchen $11 richer. So maybe Meetup is all right.

What I’m Reading:

Just started “Calypso” by David Sedaris. I used to read his books as soon as they came out but I’m quite late on this one. It’s predictably great thus far.

What I’m Watching:

V keeps saying we’ll start Man In the High Castle soon. Tonight we watched the pilot of Bodyguard on Netflix, and I can’t say I hate Richard Madden (Robb Stark!) in a suit, but I’m hoping more happens in the next episode.

What I’m Listening To:

I made a playlist specifically for the hills and sets of stairs I must climb whenever I leave the apartment. Highlights include “Apes***” by Beyoncé and Jay-Z, some Cardi B, some of The Donnas, and “Cupid Shuffle” because damn if that bop doesn’t get you moving.

What I’m Fuming About:

White Nationalists. People who don’t vote. Writer’s block. Isis’s incessant overgrooming for which we are seeing a vet on Friday and for which maybe we will try curing with some CBD oil or something. And maybe Isis will share.

Pumpkin Bars of the Gods

It’s funny how quickly you adapt to the norms of a new place. After less than 3 months in Seattle, if I forget my reusable bags when going to the grocery store, I feel an inordinate degree of shame and conspicuous “other”-ness. The smell of weed on the street is so common as to be unremarkable. Dogs have just as much a right to be basically anywhere as I do. Tipping is as expected at a coffee shop or counter service café/diner/food truck as it is at a sit-down restaurant. Everything is expensive, it just is, but I barely notice anymore.

These are weak complaints and certainly nothing that keeps me up at night. Something is, though – I haven’t been sleeping very well lately and can’t quite pinpoint why.

My favorite thing about being here so far is the writing I’m doing. Which makes it sound like I’m being incredibly productive – I am not, and I’m just as full of false starts and languishing Word docs as ever – but I’m learning a lot through the classes I’m taking and can’t wait to see what else Hugo House has to offer. Hugo House is kind of like the Art+Lit Lab in Madison, but exclusively focused on writing, and with a much bigger budget.

We’re deep into fall now and so last night I made pumpkin bars. I have lamented in the past that they are too good to relegate to a seasonal-only existence, but now I think it’s probably for the best. Here is the recipe, if you are feeling so inclined.

Pumpkin Bars of the Gods (adapted from The Breadman’s Wife)

pumpkin bars

Ingredients

2 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder
2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg (if you have it – not crucial)
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
4 eggs
1 2/3 cups sugar
1 cup oil (see notes below)
1 can (15 oz) pumpkin puree
Frosting:
- 8 oz cream cheese, softened
- 1/3 cup butter, softened
- 4 cups powdered sugar
- 2 tsp vanilla extract
- 1 tbsp milk

Directions

Combine the dry ingredients (flour, baking powder, cinnamon, nutmeg, salt, baking soda) into one bowl and set aside. In a separate bowl, whisk together eggs, sugar, oil, and pumpkin until light and fluffy. Gradually add the dry to the wet, mixing well.

Grease a 13×9 pan. Spread batter evenly and bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes (or use the toothpick trick). Let cool completely.

While it’s baking, you can make the frosting, which we all know is the real reason we are here. Mix together the butter and cream cheese (your Kitchen-Aid works best rather than by hand), then add powdered sugar, vanilla, and milk. Mix it all on high until smooth and creamy and delectable. Frost the bars with a knife and, if you’re feeling fancy, sprinkle some pumpkin pie seasoning on top when you’re done.

Notes

The oil. Pouring a big ol’ cup of vegetable/canola oil into a recipe is not the most appetizing thing and pretty obviously not great for you. That said, this is a dessert, not a salad, so if you want to use oil then you do you, my friend. I substituted Greek yogurt (1:1) (yay protein!) and the end result was about 99% the same, with the texture of the edges feeling somewhat tougher for some probably chemical reason I don’t understand. I have also subbed applesauce with similar results, so the choice really is yours.
This makes a LOT of frosting. Haters may say even too much frosting. I don’t happen to think that there is such a thing, personally, but you’ve been warned.

i do not love amy schumer but there is no more accurate gif

What I’m Reading:

I took a one-day seminar on “writing your obsessions” at Hugo House with the author Steve Almond, and really enjoyed it/him, so afterward I picked up his book on the 2016 election, Bad Stories. I couldn’t recommend it more highly. Often, reading and thinking about that period of time now makes me incredibly depressed, but Almond synthesizes the myriad reasons why it happened the way it did so plainly and cleverly that I was more fascinated than sad.

What I’m Watching:

Last night we finished season 3 of Daredevil on Netflix; V and I agreed it’s better than season 2. I was not super invested in Karen’s backstory, but I suppose it was necessary for further character development. It’s a good binge. And it was pleasantly surprising to see a South Asian actor in a key role that was totally non-stereotypical.
There is allegedly a current season of The Amazing Race happening, but we haven’t been able to stream it, so we’re consoling ourselves with watching a random old season we hadn’t watched already. I think it’s the 17th? Nick is super verbally abusive to Vicki, and Chad and Stephanie just got engaged despite him also being a pretty big dick to her, which seems to be the running theme this time around.

What I’m Eating:

Well, clearly, the pumpkin bars. I did put literally the healthiest recipe I know in the crockpot yesterday to try and balance out the extreme quantities of sugar I was consuming. That curried vegetable and chickpea stew is kind of labor-intensive for something that goes in the slow cooker, but it’s worth it IMO, and it’ll clean out your vegetable drawer in a hurry.

What I’m Fuming About:

Flights home for Christmas and how expensive they are
Isis’s continuing “overgrooming”/”barbering” habit that we naively hoped would improve upon a move to a different climate but which remains the same. I’m wondering if CBD oil would help her. Or maybe CBD oil would help me. Or maybe…
Can’t seem to get a callback on any job applications to save my life. Or any bites on pitches that I’m sending out.

What I’m Happy About:

Fall, duhhh. It’s gorgeous here.

seattle in fall

October

I don’t have a lot of words today for the Kavanaugh confirmation. I expected it. I expected Susan Collins (R-Maine) to vote yes, despite her appearance of perhaps considering giving a shit, proving herself as feckless and disingenuous and craven as all the rest. When will people learn that “moderate” Republicans don’t exist in elected office anymore? I know plenty of them IRL, but in the halls of power, there is no such thing and there hasn’t been for some time now. I have no idea what happens next. Hopefully a gigantic #bluewave in November, but I do not want to get my hopes up for that. We thought 2016 was more or less in the bag, and it fucking wasn’t. I just need to see a message sent, I just need to see that there are SOME consequences for these people’s detestable and immoral and hypocritical actions.

This past week I’ve been happiest when distancing myself from Twitter and the news – big surprise. That is the most obvious recommendation in the world for those of us having a difficult time with the current state of affairs. Tune out when you need to. Tune back in when you’re able. People on Twitter are so often more articulate than I am about what I’m mad about, though.

Related to that…V and I watched an episode of the Netflix mini-documentary series Follow This yesterday about tech addiction. The show uses Buzzfeed reporters to go and investigate weird or troubling or ultra-random shit and my girl Scaachi Koul (oh yeah, we’re besties) is on some of them. Anyway, tech addiction. They profiled a center for tech addiction rehab that’s somewhere near Seattle, interestingly enough, and talked to (all) guys about how their 14-hour gaming days or constant smartphone usage messed up their lives in all kinds of ways – bad sleep, poor nutrition, suffering interpersonal relationships, plummeting self-esteem, etc. The rehab center isolates them from technology for I don’t remember exactly how long, but I want to say like 2 months before slowly reintroducing it back into their lives. It was fascinating and V and I had a good discussion about it afterwards, both of us agreeing (not for the first time) that we are somewhat addicted to our phones and at a very very bare minimum should stop looking at them first thing in the morning and then lying in bed for an hour scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. Hoping to break that shitty habit.

I miss my friends. I miss having people with whom I could make plans almost every weekend, even if those plans were just a movie night or a football game. I need to meet more people in Seattle, but it’s hard out here (and by here I mean everywhere) for an introvert. We were just so comfortable in Madison that I wonder if we were crazy to blow it all up and come here – but I don’t regret it, I think it was the right decision. Sometimes you don’t know you’re in a rut until you’re jarred out of it. Sometimes it’s good to surprise people who might’ve thought you were too scared to ever leave, especially if one of those people is yourself.

Snapchat and FaceTime have been my lifesavers. Being able to see and talk to my parents and my friends is huuuuge, I cannot overstate how much it’s helped.

One of my Hugo House classes has started, and there’s another single-day seminar that I’m going to on Monday that’s on the topic of writing about your obsessions. Its description said “leave your inhibitions at the door,” LOLOLOL. Me? Inhibited? In groups of strangers whom I want to impress? The devil you say. I’ll try to wing it. What am I obsessed with? Um…Korean skincare. Cats. Books. Feminism. My own baked goods. Those have kind of all…been done. I might need a more unique obsession. Ya girl is #basic.

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What I’m Reading:

I just finished the sequel to “To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before,” the book made into the overwhelmingly adorable Netflix movie. YOU GUYS IT WAS SO SO GOOD! If you liked the first book, you’ll like the second (“P.S. I Still Love You”) just as much. I’m sure it will eventually be made into a movie as well but I really need that to happen like RIGHT NOW and not 2-3 years from now. At a minimum I need to know who they’re going to cast as John Ambrose McClaren. But it will definitely be a young child I’ve never heard of because I’m 32 and had heard of *no one* in the first movie except, obviously, Aiden from Sex & The City.
I have so many other books checked out from the library but the one most immediately due is “Where The Line Bleeds“, Jesmyn Ward’s first book, and considering how much I loved “Sing, Unburied, Sing” and…literally everything else she’s written, I have a good feeling about this one.
I had pre-ordered Rebecca Traister’s “Good and Mad“, but honestly, it’s like TOO on the nose right now. I know my anger can and will be useful in the fights to come – which is basically the premise, along with how that’s gone for women historically – but right now I’m so angry that I don’t want to even think about my anger.

What I’m Watching:

More of the “Follow This” mini-docs. They’re 15-20 minutes each, which is a much easier sell to V than most regular-length documentaries I want to watch 🙂 There’s one about the opioid epidemic that focuses a lot on Vancouver’s “safe injection sites” (that Seattle is also considering) and I keep telling my dad to watch it because he is an addiction specialist and I want to know what he thinks but I don’t think he has yet. There’s less-heavy ones too, about ASMR and Amish romance novels (those are two distinct episodes, if that wasn’t clear). Buzzfeed gets a semi-deserved bad rap a lot of the time, but honestly, they also do some really interesting and solid journalism.
Looking forward to seeing The Hate U Give on Friday, I know it’s going to be amazing.

What I’m Eating:

My chocolate chip cookies, currently. I can’t help it that they are my masterpiece. Though I am also thinking about making either snickerdoodles or oatmeal Raisinets tomorrow.

What’s Annoying Me:

People’s Instagram stories that are just footage from the concert they are attending. The sound quality is always awful, they’re usually not in the greatest visual position, and it always startles the shit out of me when I’m not expecting the next story I’m watching to be LOUD INTENSE MUSIC AND/OR SCREAMING. I love you guys but please just enjoy the show and tell me about it later if you must.
We went to the International District today (aka Chinatown) and the veggie egg rolls we got at the Chinese restaurant were very clearly microwaved as they were cold in the middle. #firstworldwhitepeopleproblems
The Snapchat “discover” feed or whatever the fuck it’s really called. First and foremost on it is always the latest, most explicit Kardashian or Jenner selfie, and the rest of it is similar trash along with tacky clickbait and lingerie ads.
I think this is the longest post I’ve made and it’s about very little of importance, so that’s kind of annoying in and of itself. But let’s not end on that note…

What I’m Happy About:

I’ve found a competent lady to do my brows, an easy-to-book, not wildly overpriced nail salon that offers #roséallday, an adorable gift shop that has the coolest birthday cards (SO LONG, SHITTY DRUGSTORE/TARGET SELECTION), a “natural” beauty store/pharmacy, a bookstore, our favorite pizza place, a cupcake shop that has RED VELVET ICE CREAM by the PINT, a bar that does trivia nights, a Trader Joe’s, and more – all within 3 blocks of each other on Queen Anne Avenue, which is about a half mile from our apartment. Can you even believe that? This is, without any doubt, the best neighborhood I’ve ever lived in.
I really hardly have to go to Target anymore and it’s strangely liberating – I thought I would miss it, but I don’t!
My assignment for last week’s class at Hugo House got nice feedback.
We had a very sweet video chat with V’s mom tonight that was much-needed.
It is, at last, fall.

Image result for fall autumn memes

Kava-NAW, etc.

I am feeling discouraged today.

In a couple of months I will have been unemployed for a year. I suppose another way of saying that is that I have been a freelance writer for a year – and believe me, that’s what my resume says, and that’s how I try to think of it – but it has not been as fruitful as I’d like and that’s probably more my fault than any external factors. I never expected it to be easy and I never expected to make a ton of money, so at least I haven’t been surprised on those fronts. I’ve pitched some editors – maybe half a dozen – and gotten zero responses, which any writer can tell you is far worse than any rejection. A friend of a friend told me about Hugo House here in Seattle, and I’ve signed up for a couple of multi-week workshops, one of which starts tomorrow – I’m dreadfully intimidated but also just kind of dying to DO IT. I see so many women out there thriving in their writing careers and I cheer them on with every bit of my heart – I just want to get where they are, where I could casually say “here’s my latest for [x badass publication]…” instead of “OMG YOU GUYS SOMEONE ACTUALLY PUBLISHED ME THIS IS REAL THIS IS HAPPENING!!!” It will take time…I know. I feel impatient today.

And I also know that a year ago, I would’ve killed just to be published anywhere at all – so paying attention and respect to progress that has been made would probably be a better route to take, mentally.

I’ve been trying to find a therapist here but it seems like none of the lady shrinks in my network are accepting new patients and the one place that seemed promising isn’t returning my email.

We bought a new mattress and it’s delightful but naturally takes some getting used to especially since it is memory foam and we are not really accustomed to that. The firmness! My God, the firmness! My body feels good but also sore?? Or is it sore from Seattle’s hills and stairs?

Allegations against Brett Kavanaugh continue to pile up – today a third woman went public. How many will it take? How many women have to tell their stories? My Twitter feed is positively bursting at the seams with women sharing their sexual harassment and assault traumas…and it just. doesn’t. matter. If nothing else, this whole episode – hell, the last two years – have been extremely illuminating re: the number of people we have in our government who could not care less about sexual assault. They’re going to vote on Friday no matter what happens on Thursday. It’s all a foregone conclusion. What breaks my heart perhaps the most is the female GOP senators who could be putting a stop to all this and for whatever reason, aren’t. My expectations for white men in power are already subterranean so it’s pleasantly surprising when any one of them stands up for women or any marginalized group. But a woman should know. A woman should get it. If Susan Collins was my senator, I’d be picketing her office every day of the week and twice on Sunday until she agreed to vote against this piece of misogynist elitist garbage.

Then there’s all the civilian Republicans who, I guess, just have no problem with giving an alleged serial sexual assaulter a lifetime appointment on the highest court in the land. Your cousin. Your neighbor. Your boss. Your pastor. People in your life that you care about and respect, who aren’t showing any kind of care and respect toward women, because they are just going along with the party line. It’s really, really disappointing to see the lengths people will go to not believe women. Women who have EVERYTHING to lose by coming forward. We’re learning a lot about our friends and family members and community leaders by their responses to this stuff.

What I’m Reading:

“The Very Worst Missionary” by Jamie Wright, the story of a woman who became a Christian in her 20s as a young mom and decided to go be a missionary in Costa Rica and discovered that most mission work is bad/useless/counterproductive. Having lots of flashbacks to the weeklong “missions trip” my church youth group went on to Costa Rica in 2003. We…were not super helpful. Anyway, she’s funny and very sweary and unapologetic, my kind of girl.

What I’m Watching:

Still lots of Brooklyn 99. When I started it several weeks ago, I picked up in like season 3 or 4. So we watched all of that until it got current, and now we’re going back to the beginning to see what I missed. It’s so delightful.

What I’m Listening To:

Ella Mai, “Boo’d Up” and “10,000 Hours” and “A Thousand Times”. Also “Best Part” from H.E.R. (featuring Daniel Caesar). I had never heard of any of those people until about a week ago when I was hanging out at a coffee shop and letting YouTube play whatever it wanted after I picked a random Beyoncé song. “Best Part” is the song that plays in my mind when I envision a beautiful autumnal falling-in-love montage: walking through the leaves, drinking cider while wearing sweaters and scarves, cuddling by the fireplace, all the basic shit. Highly recommend.

What I’m Fuming About:

I believe we’ve covered that.

screaming

Soapbox Time

It was January 2016 when I decided, after reading Jonathan Safran Foer’s “Eating Animals“, to stop eating meat. I’d read enough about chickens living in cages so small they couldn’t stand, lying in their own shit; about cows being electrocuted and abused for, really, no good reason; about pigs being pumped full of unnecessary growth hormones and antibiotics that are still present in the pork we eat. It was a lot, and while I knew that a life of hardcore animal rights activism was probably not in my future, I also knew that it would cost me very little (and probably benefit me long-term) to simply give up eating meat. That was the concrete action I could take. It wasn’t going to solve the whole massive problem, but I at least wouldn’t feel complicit in it anymore.

I had those same stirrings in my mind the other day when I watched “The True Cost” documentary on Netflix. The film is about the fast fashion industry, and its really wide-reaching environmental/human rights consequences. The director interviews factory workers in Cambodia, Bangladesh, Haiti, and other developing nations, where he’s told about atrocious conditions and salaries that are basically one tiny step above slavery. We see:

devastating footage of the Rana Plaza factory collapse of 2013, where over 1,000 people were killed and around 2,500 injured in the deadliest structural collapse in recorded history (workers had reported cracks in the building in the days before the tragedy, but were forced to go back to work anyway)
segments shot in Kanpur, India where local leather tanneries emit a shit-ton of toxic chemicals and pollutants into the environment, causing it to leak into the Ganges (which is already fucked up) and contaminate pretty much everything from the soil to the area’s drinking water. Not having even a passing competence in the correct scientific terminology, all I can tell you is that the number of children in the region born with birth defects is staggering, not to mention the incidences of cancer and other serious diseases
landfills in Haiti, because the vast majority of donated clothing winds up not sold in thrift stores – it gets shipped overseas to countries where its massive presence depresses the local garment industry

There is just so much here – but none of it is exactly breaking news. Fast fashion creates unbelievable amounts of waste. And just like with the meat industry, that’s something that I’ve probably always known in the back of my mind, but just have never really been willing to address head on. For a lot of people who eat meat, ignorance is bliss – bacon and ribs and fried chicken taste good and if you don’t have to think about what happened before it got to your plate, everything’s golden. Fast fashion is cheap and cute, and we never have any real reason to think any deeper about how it got to our malls or our closets – this shirt is here and it’s $6 so let’s buy one in each color! I’m *super* fucking guilty. I’ve used up and thrown away more Target, Gap, and Old Navy t-shirts than I care to admit. Everyone has.

Related image — *I did not independently verify these stats but they are similar to others I’ve read in fast fashion articles.*

So…do I do what I did with meat? Can I quit fast fashion cold turkey? I can’t think of a good reason not to. I’m not in dire need of any new clothes at the moment; when I do need something new, I will probably have the time and financial resources to make a more ethical purchase. I don’t have to hit up the clothing section every time I go to Target. (And actually in Seattle I hardly go there anymore, because it’s a huge pain in the ass, but that’s a story for another day.) I am hardly a fashion plate; I wear what’s comfortable, reasonably cute/flattering, and affordable. For a lot of my life that has translated to 2/$12 Target tops and 5/$25 Victoria’s Secret undies, but I don’t know if I can continue doing that.

I’m not deluding myself. I know that a) my solo commitment won’t really change anything in the global marketplace, and b) I probably won’t always be able to find “ethical” alternatives to something I need, and c) fashion is hardly the only highly unethical and environmentally-damaging industry – hello cars, electronics, jewelry, plastics, etc etc etc. I’ll do *yet another* vegetarianism parallel – I don’t eat meat, but I haven’t gone full vegan, meaning I still consume dairy and eggs, despite knowing full well the shitty ways those cows and chickens are often treated before we get our milk and omelettes. I’m not perfect. I haven’t figured out how to live a 100% ethical life because it’s essentially impossible unless you’re going to go live in a commune where you make all your own clothes, grow your own food, never use transportation other than a bike or a canoe, yadda yadda yadda. So please don’t get too annoyed at my preaching. I’m not judging anyone else’s choices – this is just how I feel, knowing what I know.

“The True Cost” is pretty short on solutions (consumer capitalism basically has to end, is more or less the message), but there are lots of fair trade companies out there: Pact Apparel, Everlane, People Tree, Passion Lilie – I just ordered a cute ikat-print sweater from there today. It’s definitely more expensive and there’s no way around that – I guess my strategy is going to be a) just buy less in the first place because I already have a ton of clothes, b) adjust my mindset regarding how much a certain item should cost (although I just don’t see myself forking over $200 for a top), c) hunt for those sales like any good American.

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Sweet Potato & Spinach Pasta

I’ll write a *real* blog soon, but I did want to share this recipe with y’all because it turned out so deliciously.

Moving puts a real cramp in anyone’s diet, I think. Before you move, you’re trying to eat up everything you have, so you end up with a bunch of weird meals. Once you get to your new place, you’re starting your fridge and pantry mostly from scratch. So you go grocery shopping, get everything you think you need, come home to cook and then find that you don’t have any olive oil because why would you have thought to buy it because you always have it at ho – oh wait. To that end, we’ve had several delivery nights and nights of cereal for supper. Honestly, V would be happy having cereal for supper 4 nights out of the week if I didn’t strenuously object.

I basically halved this recipe to suit our needs, but I almost wish I hadn’t so we could’ve had leftovers. The pot was definitely scraped clean last night. AND, this is a one-pot dish!

Sweet Potato & Spinach Pasta (adapted from Build Your Bite)

Ingredients

1 box pasta (I used medium shells which absorbed the sauce really nicely)
dash of EVOO
1/2 a white onion, diced
4 cloves of garlic, minced
1 large sweet potato, peeled and diced (fairly small)
5 cups vegetable broth
S&P to taste
pinch of sage
pinch of thyme
2 1/2 cups fresh spinach
1/2 cup heavy whipping cream
1 1/4 cup grated Parmesan

Instructions

Add the EVOO to a good-sized stockpot on medium heat. Drop in the diced onions, garlic, and sweet potato. Let that cook for 8-10 minutes until the sweet potato starts to get soft.
Pour in the vegetable broth, pasta, and herbs and bring the pot to a boil. Mix well and cook for 10 minutes or until the pasta is al dente.
Turning the heat to low, add the cream, Parmesan, and S&P; stir well.
After the sauce has thickened, throw in the spinach and stir until it wilts.

Notes

If you are halving the recipe, you may need more than 2 1/2 cups of vegetable broth in order to get all the pasta to cook. Just put in enough so that everything is covered by broth.
I probably didn’t *exactly* halve the cream and the Parm. *shrug* So much the better. I may be entirely kidding myself to think that this recipe is healthy, considering all the aforementioned fat. But you can certainly adjust those amounts as you see fit.
I definitely did not have sage or thyme on hand when I made this. I skipped it. It turned out fantastic anyway.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Photo by Buenosia Carol on Pexels.com

Photo by Ela Haney on Pexels.com

To All The Crazy Rich Asians I’ve Set Up (or, how to cope with tough transitions via the movies)

We watched Set It Up tonight. I’m absolutely loving this romcom revival thing happening. Crazy Rich Asians, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, now Set It Up – like the industry finally got the message that 1) romcoms can be amazing if you don’t treat women like objects/audiences like they’re stupid; 2) romcoms (like basically all movies) are way better when they’re diverse; 3) THE WORLD IS ON FIRE 24/7 AND WE NEED SOME GODDAMN PEACE AND HAPPINESS AND JOY IN OUR LIVES and if that has to come to us via Netflix and/or the nearest AMC/Regal theater, so fucking be it.

I’m 100% serious when I say to you that these three movies have significantly improved my quality of life over the last month. Because life has been a bit of a chaotic mess. We moved across the country. We haven’t been able to sell our house. I still don’t have a “real” “job”. Our apartment, though very nice, has far more boxes than any sub-900 square foot space should, and we keep ordering shit online so they KEEP MULTIPLYING. (Necessary shit! I swear! A toaster, a bathtub stopper, cat food…) So when I can sit down after a long day of unpacking and purging crap we should’ve gotten rid of before we moved, and watch two dorks fall in love despite their stupid selves, while eating ice cream or pizza or Thai or $10 popcorn with my husband, you better believe I’m gonna do it. I need to do it.

Of the three, I’d say To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before is my favorite, so if you want to pick just one to watch (though you should really watch all three), go with Laura Jean.

In other news. The weather has turned from hot and sunny to cool and cloudy and I couldn’t be happier. Walking three blocks vertically (stairs upon stairs upon stairs) is a lot less grotesque when it’s 70 and not 88. And it’s nice to do phone calls when I’m on my way home doing the descent. If you want a phone date, hit me up to get on the walk-and-talk schedule.

What I’m reading:

Roxane Gay’s Ayiti, which was her first book and the only one in her canon I haven’t yet devoured. It’s short stories, like Difficult Women, and although that is not my favorite genre of writing it is still obviously really really good.

What I’m watching:

Well we already covered that in part, but I’ve also started binging Brooklyn 99. I had seen a few episodes awhile back but didn’t get into it, and I’m now correcting that error. Boyle is my favorite. Literally everything he says makes me laugh. It’s another pure joy I’m glad to have in my life right now.

What I’m fuming about:

How we’ll never have meaningful gun control in this country, just more hashtags and thoughts and prayers
Climate change in general has been on my mind lately, as Madison floods and Seattle has Mumbai-esque air quality and something about an ice shelf melting in Antarctica
Lots more but I don’t feel like wallowing in the muck today.

Chapter 1, Week 1

We’re here and it’s taken me a few days to gather my thoughts, I guess.

Moving day itself was a predictable shitshow, but all three of us survived the plane ride, despite Isis’s very clear displeasure. Actually “moving in” to our apartment wasn’t terribly difficult since all we had was a few suitcases (okay fine, 5) and an air mattress. All of our stuff is supposed to arrive (🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻) on Tuesday. At that point, I think it’ll start feeling a little more like home. A totally empty, echo-y living room doesn’t do much for the hygge vibes.

We’ve had a fun time exploring this week. We visited Discovery Park and Alki Beach and procured library cards and gone to two, yes two, movies (BlackKklansman and Crazy Rich Asians) and tomorrow night we’re going to go to a Seattle Storm game (WNBA) to satisfy my inner 10-year-old who so loved the fact that a women’s professional basketball league was finally being created. Who cares if the SuperSonics franchise moved to Oklahoma – we’ve got the Storm, baby.

(BlackKlansman was really really good but if we’re comparing Jordan Peele movies, I think Get Out is superior. Crazy Rich Asians was a lot of fun and it was refreshing to see a non-idiotic but also non-emo romcom in theaters again – God, it feels like it’s been forever – but I know from my Twitter feed that Awkwafina’s “blaccent” rubbed some people the wrong way. That’s really not my argument to have, though. And the whole character of Awkwafina’s brother, how his whole deal was just being really creepy towards Rachel, Constance Wu’s character? What the hell was that? Everything is at least a little problematic these days.)

Anyway. I really love Queen Anne. I’m glad we chose this spot.

Today we largely got around downtown/Capitol Hill/QA without using Google maps 😎 which I think is quite the victory. Downtown is still pretty confusing in spots but it helps that the theater we have chosen as our own is right across the street from the hotel we stayed at on two different trips – so we’re pretty familiar with the area.

I’m a little homesick, but not terribly so yet. I say yet because I know at some point it’s going to hit me hard and I’m very much not looking forward to that. FaceTime and Snapchat have helped a lot, actually. I need to get more Snapchat-proficient. I’ve actually been wearing Wisconsin-themed clothes all week because that’s just what I packed, totally unintentionally. I’m still checking Madison.com every day. I’m not forgetting where home actually really is.

I need all the ASMR I can get

We’re back from India and about a week away from moving so, as you can imagine, I am very FHEJSDAKJDOIWEJRIOEWJDWAKFNKAJFDOASJD:OWAK.

India India India. It was wonderful to be with our family, and it was very special to be able to mark the anniversary of V’s dad’s passing with so many loved ones. But being an introvert in India is a little bit of a 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife situation, if the spoons are people, and the knife is solitude. It’s like being an alcoholic in Utah. This place ain’t meant for you. There’s nothing wrong with you and there’s nothing wrong with the place, but it’s not meant to be. Which is not to say that I don’t love going; I do. But it’s one of the reasons we will never ever live there.

I was observing a lot of white couples at the airport on the day we left and getting inexplicably annoyed like I always do. Skinny girls in plain tank tops with colorful harem pants and messy hair and dirty chappals. I think they come for yoga, but that’s just an educated guess. Why do they bother me? I guess I think that they treat India like a product. But what’s really wrong with them visiting and enjoying the culture? It’s pretty ballsy to go to India on your own, without knowing anybody or knowing any of the languages. I wouldn’t do it. If V wasn’t in my life, India would barely be on my radar beyond its geopolitical significance. India is fucking intense. It’s loud and stressful and smelly and sometimes dangerous and often dirty and hot and crowded and, as aforementioned, inhospitable to introverts. People are very very kind, generous, and friendly on an individual level but strangers are indifferent at best, hostile at worst. It always takes me a day or two to remember not to smile at anyone I don’t know. I’m an American and a Midwesterner to boot – smiling (by which I mostly mean tepid no-teeth smiles) is like breathing. The watchman will let me in and maybe grunt hello but he will NOT smile, will NOT ask how I am, and if I do either one, it’s an “invitation” rather than my cultural habit.

I think I’ve had about enough travel for 2018. After the move, other than coming home for the holidays, I think we will stay put for a little while. Which means you should come visit me!

What I’m reading:

Haven’t finished The H-Spot quite yet but I’ve also started Educated by Tara Westover, which is truly fascinating. It’s a memoir of a girl who grew up in a sort of survivalist/antigovernment Mormon family in Idaho, without any formal schooling throughout her childhood.

What I’m watching:

I discovered a new way to calm my nerves during takeoff on a plane: watching Bob Ross videos! It seems so obvious now I don’t know how I didn’t think of it sooner. Watching him paint is really ASMR heaven and the perfect calming antidote for flying anxiety.

What I’m fuming about:

I’m trying to ignore the outside world as much as possible this week amid all the moving preparations. I’m sure there’s a lot to be angry about but I don’t have the bandwidth for it right now. So today let’s try a different list-

What I’m anxious about:

handling Isis in the airport and on the flight itself and in the Uber to our new apartment
living for an undetermined amount of time without the vast majority of our belongings since the moving truck will arrive in Seattle anywhere from like 7-14 days after we do
finding a new primary care doctor and psychiatrist
being lonely/homesick

Next time I’ll write a list of what I’m excited about – because I am excited! – but we’ll leave it here today.

Not-sure-if-zckh1c

July is always weird

My home currently does not look like a place where two semi-sloppy people live and eat and sleep and play and bathe, but rather a place carefully and meticulously staged to remove any semblance of personality in order to entice the largest number of prospective buyers. Because that’s what we’re tryna do here. It’s been a weird week.

In my haste to get the house picture-perfect for listing photos, I misplaced my to-do list notebook. Couldn’t find it for two days, aka a goddamn eternity in to-do list time. Tonight, discovered I had (totally intentionally) put it in the microwave. Out of sight out of mind!!!!

Anyway – I am going to miss this house a lot. We looked at sooo many before finally getting an accepted offer on this one. So many other offers had fallen through or been rejected. But as always, things worked out like they were supposed to; this was the right house for us. It has its quirks and imperfections and scars, some of which we’ve grown to love and others we merely tolerate. We learned that owning a corner lot in a snowy state is double the work. We learned that outdoor maintenance is not, in fact, optional. We learned that some neighbors take their own lawns very very seriously and God help you if your lawn begins to threaten theirs with “weed creep”. And that those neighbors will report you to the city in a heartbeat if your arbor vitae branches begin to bend over the sidewalk under the municipally-mandated 7 foot clearance.

It’s been a trip.

One thing I will NOT miss about this house is how so many of the electrical outlets and light switch plates are not installed levelly. I swear at least two thirds of them are crooked AF, making hanging stuff in their vicinity quite a challenge because it will end up looking off even if it is perfectly level.

I’ve been wanting to write but lacking inspiration, hence this pretty dull post.

What I’m Reading:

“The H-Spot: The Feminist Pursuit of Happiness” by Jill Filipovic. I’m not very far into it yet but the premise – that society should make the happiness of women an explicit goal – is an interesting one for which I’m very curious to see the case made. It sounds kind of preposterous when you put it like that…but I’m betting Filipovic will make s pretty convincing argument.

What I’m Watching:

My Hero Academia

Twitter thread on it.

What I’m fuming about:

Look, the list is a mile long like always, but I don’t feel like getting into the geopolitical muck today. I will limit my fumes to 1) the utterly Kafkaesque absurdity that is Indian travel bureaucracy, and 2) the fact that teleportation does not yet exist and my cat and I have to endure 4.5 hours of air travel when we move to Seattle and I’m SO WORRIED ABOUT HER YOU GUYS SHE’S KIND OF OLD AND WHAT ABOUT THE AIR PRESSURE AND IS SHE GOING TO PUKE EVERYWHERE AND/OR MEOW INCESSANTLY AND DEAR GOD WHAT IF SHE POOPS OR PEES? More critically WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO CALL HER WHILE TRAVELING BECAUSE IT SURE AS SHIT CAN’T BE HER REAL NAME.

One or both of us is going to need to be highly medicated for that trip.